


More Part II

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode Tag, Episode: s04e15 Inauguration: Over There, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-05-27
Updated: 2003-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-30 17:13:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15101315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: Donna's thoughts during the inauguration as they relate to one Joshua Lyman.





	More Part II

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**More Part II**

**by:** Anon

**Character(s):** Josh/Donna  
**Pairing(s):** Josh/Donna  
**Category(s):** Romance  
**Rating:** PG  
**Disclaimer:** I don’t own these characters.  
**Summary:** Donna’s thoughts during the inauguration as they relate to one Joshua Lyman.  (Companion piece to "More",’ Josh’s thoughts on Donna. If you haven’t read that, this will not make sense.)  
**Spoiler:** “Inauguration: Part I” and “Inauguration: Over There”  
**Author's Note:** Much of this is taken directly from the two-parter, “Inauguration Part I  & Over There.”  My hope is that you won’t be able to tell where Sorkin ends and I begin.  That’s not an easy task.  If you have not seen either of the “Inauguration” episodes, this might not make sense. 

One minute, I’m talking to Jack about the inaugural balls, the next minute, he’s packing everything on his desk.

“What’s going on?” I ask with apparent shock on my face.

“I’ve been reassigned,” he responds without looking up.

“Reassigned?  Where?”

“Close the door, Donna.”

I do as I’m told, and Jack places both hands on the desk in front of him and takes a deep breath.  “Aviano Air Force Base, transfer effective immediately.”

“This...there must be some kind of mistake, you just got here!”

He shakes his head.  “There’s no mistake.  I’ve got orders.  I’m leaving tomorrow morning.”

“Jack, there must be something you can do,” I think for just a second, “or I can do....Josh.  I can talk to Josh.”

“It won’t help,” he nervously chuckles.

“What happened, Jack?  Why are they making you leave?”

“I did as I was told, and sometimes people have to take the fall,” he shrugs, “I’ve gotta get a move on.  I’ll explain more at my place tonight.”

“Right.”

I’m speechless.  As I walk back to my office, I turn around and head toward the Oval Office where I know Josh is meeting with the President.  I catch him as he exits the office and tell him about Jack’s reassignment.  He tells me something about Navy men ‘bopping’ around the globe, and I want to hit him.  The word ‘bopping’ is a child’s word that conjures up images of weebles and toddlers, which means that Josh thinks I’m being childish.  I know how he works.

“He said he was asked to do something for somebody.  It can only be Nancy, Leo, or the President,” I say as we walk.

“Three doors you definitely want to knock on to complain about your boyfriend being transferred to the Italian Alps,” he says with a devilish grin.  That’s enough to put me over the edge.

“Hey, I’m not Gidget, ok!”

“Is he complaining?”

“He doesn’t complain.”

“I ask you that because sometimes people request transfers.”

I pause because Josh is obviously not taking this seriously.  I’m not necessarily upset because they’re transferring Jack (who I have never referred to as my boyfriend); rather, I’m upset that the powers that be are sending him away without warning.  Everything seems shady, and I want to get to the bottom of this internal White House political bullshit.

“Somebody asked him to do something and he did it.  I take him at his word, as should you; there’d be no reason not to...Is there anything else?” I huff.

“No.”

“Thank you, sir,” I chide as I walk briskly away from his office and Charlie takes my place.

***

Josh thinks we play this jealousy game, but it isn’t really a game.  I’ll admit, I try making him jealous with stupid little things like what Jack’s wearing to the balls, but that’s just silly stuff.  It’s not meant to be a game nor is it meant to make him jealous.  But I think it does.  I like to watch him squirm.  In my own sick way, I relish the fact that when I’m dating someone, Josh doesn’t have control over me and it kills him.

I guess I’m thinking all of these things tonight because Josh infuriated me.  Making matters worse, he treated me like a child, which I cannot stand.  I am a grown woman - a grown, beautiful woman that he can see but cannot touch, and that enrages him.

I’m sitting in my car in the parking lot trying to decide where to go.  Do I go to Jack’s place and wait for him?  Do I go back inside the White House and give Josh a piece of my mind?  I settle on going to my apartment for a couple of hours.  I need to make a call.

***

“Hello?”

“On a scale from one to ten, how tan are you?”

“Donna!  How are you?” Sam asks with a grin on his face.

I sigh, “I’ve had better days.”

“Uh oh.  Josh again?”

“Sort of...did I catch you at a bad time?”

“No, not at all.  What’s up?”

I’ve always counted on Sam.  Since his move back to California, we’ve become even closer than we were when he lived in D.C.  We talk once a week, usually on Sunday nights, to check in with the craziness of the political worlds we live in.  Josh knows that Sam and I are in touch frequently, but he doesn’t know that we discuss the intricacies of our relationship.  Sam’s the only one I talk to about that.

“Jack got reassigned today to Aviano Air Force Base,” I begin.

“Aviano as in Italy?”

“Yeah.  I’m not clear on the details, but one minute we were planning dinner before the inaugural balls, and the next he was packing everything at his desk.”

“That’s odd.”

“I know...I explained everything to Josh, and he was his typical tyrannical self.  He treated me like a love-sick teenager, Sam.”

“Tyrannical? Is that a word?”

“It should be....I’m not sure what to do.  On one hand, I want to tell Josh to grow the hell up, and on the other, I want to sit him down and have a serious discussion about why he treats me this way.”

“Donna?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you more concerned about what Josh thinks or the fact that your boyfriend is being transferred?”

Sam’s a smart, insightful man.  I have to think about that for a minute.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” I say.

“In any case, I think you should get to the bottom of this thing with Jack and deal with Josh later.”

“I’m going to Jack’s after I get off the phone with you.”

“Good girl.”

“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Sam.”

“You’d probably make wiser decisions, for one.”

We both laugh a little.

“Thanks Sam.  I can’t wait to see you soon.”

“Me too.  Good luck, Donna, and give my best to everyone.”

“I will.”

With that, we hang up, I change clothes, and I begin my journey toward Josh.  I mean Jack.

***

When I get to Jack’s place, he’s hanging up the phone with a researcher from _The Washington Post_.  He explains to me what he said, and I nearly pop my socket.

“Jack, that’s a horrible thing to say!  Besides that, it’s not true!”

“It IS true, Donna.  You don’t see it because you’re blinded by the bureaucracy.”

“The White House has a commitment to the men and women who serve this country.”

Jack chuckles.

“You’re an idealist, Donna.  I love that about you.”  He touches my cheek.

“You might have just gotten in big trouble.”

“I admit that I flew off the handle.”

“Sometimes you just need to keep what you really feel inside, Jack.”

“Are you speaking from experience?”

Jack’s referring to something all together different now.  A subject that we’ve talked about on five, count ‘em, FIVE separate occasions.  I won’t let him talk about that right now.

“You can’t let them print that quote, Jack.  They’ll have your career.”

He sits down on the floor, rubbing his temples.  “You’re right.  That’s not easy for me to say, Donna, but you’re right.  I shouldn’t have said it and now my career is on the line.”

He looks like he’s going to cry.

“Let me take the fall.  I’ll tell everyone that I said it.”

“Donna, I couldn’t...”

“It’s the only way,” I interrupt, “your career is too important to mess things up now.”

He silently agrees with me.  We discuss our next course of action when my cell phone beeps.  I have a message.  It’s from Josh:

“I’ve been meaning to tell you that you shouldn’t say your name on your voicemail.  You say it on your home phone too.  It’s a safety thing...Anyway, it’s Josh. I left a message for you at home.  We’re headed to Iota.  It won’t be a long night, just a couple of drinks.  We should talk.”

The first part of his message makes me grin despite myself.  The second part allows me to see Josh’s well-hidden desperation to see me.  I don’t mean that in an arrogant way.  When Josh and I fight, he likes to clear the air as soon as possible.  I prefer to mull things over and think about why we’re fighting.  So we have the thinker versus the actor.  Or is it act-er?

I hit speed dial to call him back, but Jack removes the phone from my hand.

“That was Josh,” he states rather than asks.

“Yeah.”

“Can we have one evening - my last evening - without Josh?”

“What are you talking about,” I nervously giggle, “Josh has never been with us.  And he was calling to...”

“Donna, let’s just leave the man and his name out of our lives tonight.  Just one night.”

I cannot do that.  I don’t tell Jack that, but I can’t leave Josh out of anything that I do.

“Ok,” I lie.

Just then, Jack’s home phone rings.  He’s only got one phone and it’s with him in the bedroom.

“Are you gonna get that?” I ask from the kitchen.

“Caller ID says it’s an unknown caller.  Must be a telemarketer.”

It’s not a telemarketer.  I’m not stupid, despite what this man may think.

I help Jack pack the few things he has lying around his apartment as we decide that I should call CJ to warn her about the quote.

***

CJ’s not happy with me at all, as I fully expected.  Just wait until Josh hears.

“Jack, I think I’m going to head home now,” I say after spending the better part of the night helping him pack.

“What?  You’re not going to stay the night?  This is it, Donna.  I’m on a plane tomorrow.”

“And you should get some sleep.”

I kiss him on the lips then head to the door.

“Good luck, Jack,” I say with my back toward him.

He doesn’t respond.  I take that as my cue to exit.

When I get into my car, tears are already spilling down my cheeks.  I immediately start the engine and head toward 2832 Wilson Boulevard in Arlington.

***

“Hi Cynthia, is Josh here?”  I ask as I finally spot the waitress in the crowded bar.

“Nope, he left over an hour ago.  Can I get you something to drink?”

“No, thanks.”

“Cynthia?” I call out before she walks away, “did you find it strange that I wasn’t here tonight?”

“I did until Josh told me that you might call.”

“Thanks.”

Josh wanted me to be there tonight.  He told our waitress that I might call.  I walk back to my car with my head hung low.  I guess some things just aren’t meant to be.

***

The next morning, I’m awake at 6:09 am.  I drudge to the stoop with my robe securely around me, and I pick up the dreaded _Post_.  Immediately, I flip to the page with Danny’s article and read the damning quote.

Shit.  I’ve done it again.  I let a man have power over me.  I put his career in front of mine.  Sometimes I like to think of it as my being selfless, but in reality, it’s just my being stupid.  There’s only one thing saving my sanity and dignity right now.  If anyone in the White House reads the entire quote, they’ll know it wasn’t me.  That’s my only shred of hope.

I piddle around my apartment for a couple of hours, throwing ball gowns on the bed and trying them on.  I bought four new gowns for the balls tonight, knowing full well I’d keep one and exchange the rest.  Josh likes me in red.  I didn’t buy a red one.

My phone rings as I’m unzipping the dress that I ultimately decide on wearing tonight.  Although I’m not going to the ball because I’m too ashamed to face my friends and co-workers, I’m still going to wear my beautiful gown that I spent $309 on.

“Hello?”

“Hey.  Did I wake you?”  Josh’s voice is softer than I expected.

“No, I’ve been awake for a couple of hours.”

“Did you get the messages I left for you last night?”

Yes, I got the messages, the page, and I know you called Jack’s and hung up.

“Yeah.  I was busy...I couldn’t see you last night, Josh.”

“Why not?”

I sigh, “Because.”

“Because you had to be with Jack?” he asks with a bitterness that wasn’t there a second ago.

“No.  Because I didn’t want to...I didn’t want to face you after the thing.”

“What thing, Donna?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know.  _The Post_ article, Josh.”

I’m looking at my feet.  Even on the phone I can’t look him in the eye, so to speak, when I’ve done something wrong.

“Donna, I know you were upset about Jack’s reassignment, but venting to a reporter is not the way to handle your frustration.”

“He was a researcher.”

“Whatever. You’re quoted as bashing this administration.  The administration that you work for.  Not to mention the timing of all this...Donna, this isn’t just a slap on the wrist.  This is the kind of stuff that gets you reprimanded.  Leo’s gonna want to talk to you.”

“I know.”

That’s all I can say because he’s right.  I know that I’m in hot water, and I’m going to have to face Leo.

“Toby’s paging me,” he says more to himself than to me.

“I’m sorry Josh.”

“Just get to the capitol as soon as you can.  This is a big day.”

“I know.  Goodbye.”

“Bye.”

I hang up the phone knowing full well that I’m not going to the inauguration today.

***

It’s time for the President’s speech, so I turn on the television and watch as Will and Toby’s words come pouring out of my boss’ mouth.  He’s eloquent.  The speech is outstanding.  For the first time tonight, I want to be there.  I want to tell Will that he blew ‘em out of the water.  I want to tell the President that he looked and sounded brilliant.  I want to tell CJ that the Press is doing a marvelous job.  I want to tell Josh that...

I don’t finish that thought.  Instead, I scoop another blob of mocha chocolate chip ice cream into my bowl.  I set the bowl down to look at myself in the mirror.  I look great.  Mrs. Ruzicky, my neighbor, said I look like I belong in a fairytale.  All for nothing.

I wonder about Jack.  Things like: did he make it on the plane?  Did he manage to pack everything?  Did the movers show up on time?  Did he honestly think I’d believe him when he said a telemarketer called at 11 pm last night?

I wonder how long it’s going to take before Josh gives in and calls me.  My guess is two drinks.  He can be flaming mad at me, but in the end, he forgives me, and that’s why I, you know.

About an hour later, my phone rings.

“Hello?”

“Hey, it’s me.  Why aren’t you here?”

“I couldn’t.”  My mind isn’t working very well right now.

“Donna, you’re a part of this administration no matter what.  People expected you to be here.  In good times and in bad, isn’t that how it goes?”

I was right: he’s halfway drunk.

“Have you been drinking, Josh?”

 “I...I’m on my second drink.”

Correct again: two drinks.

“I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be there right now.”

“We’ll deal with all that tomorrow.  The President is just beginning his second term.  Come celebrate with him.”

“I doubt he’d want to see me.”

“Come on Donna!” he begs, “What are you doing right now?”  
  


“I’m watching commentary on the speech on, like, five different channels.”

“Who has the best coverage?”

“You mean which news organization is saying the nicest things about your boss?”

“Our boss,” he corrects me.  “Donna, you should be here.  Are you dressed?  I can come get you.”

“I’m in my ball gown as if I’m there, Josh.  I don’t want you to come get me.”

“Last chance, Donnatella.”

He has no idea how close I am to taking him up on his offer.  Ask me once more, Josh.  Just once more.

Nothing.

“Enjoy the night.  Celebrate.  I’ll let you know if we should send flowers to CNN.”

“I miss you.”

He let that one slip.

“Bye, Josh.”

I’m sad that I couldn’t be there with him tonight.  I really am, but I don’t deserve to be with any of them tonight.  To hell with ice cream, I need a drink.

Josh bought me a bottle of scotch about six months ago.  He knows I don’t drink the stuff, but he told me to keep it because it was an expensive bottle that he didn’t think would last more than a week at his place.  I think he wanted an excuse to drink it with me at my apartment, but I began dating Jack, and that blew that.

I open the bottle for the first time and take a sniff.  Whoo!  How can anyone drink this stuff?  It nearly singed my nose hairs.  But it smells like Josh.  I’m sure Toby smells like scotch too sometimes, but I’ve never been close enough to Toby’s face to smell his breath after he’d been drinking.  Josh, on the other hand, I’ve been close enough to many times.  His breath smells warm and cozy, kind of like sitting in front of a fireplace with a blanket wrapped around me in the dead of winter.

I take a swig right out of the bottle.  I cringe as the liquid goes down my throat.  It reminds me of those Drain-O commercials where they pour a thick liquid into a drain and you watch it go down the pipe until the clog is gone.  I wipe the back of my hand against my mouth, put the cap back on the bottle, and then go back to the couch.

Flopping on the sofa in my beautiful gown, I savor the taste in my mouth.  This is what he must taste like.  I close my eyes.  I try desperately not to let my imagination run wild with the thought of Josh and scotch.  I’m jolted from my daydream by the sound of pounding on my window.

I get up to look outside.  Oh no.  This is not happening.

“What the hell are you doing?!” I yell while opening my window.

“Get down here, now!”

“Keep your voice down!”

“Don’t even think about telling me where to keep my voice, get down here!”

I shut the window and literally run down the steps, my heart beating wildly.

“You come down here without a coat?”

“I need you to keep your voice down!”

He drapes his coat on my shoulders.

“Go ahead, you’re entitled, give it all to me again.”

He takes a deep breath like he’s about to give a speech, “You don’t know that the White House rejected ten billion for the D.O.D.  You have absolutely no way of knowing that...Jack said it.”  he nods his head, looking for affirmation, “The researcher called Jack, and Jack said it.”

“He was working a lot of nights, and it really wore him out.”

“Yeah?”

“And then this thing happened.  He didn’t think he was on the record.”

“Donna!”

“He didn’t Josh, that was legitimate.”

“And he’s letting you take the credit for this?”

“Listen, this guy has an important career ahead of him.”

“Your career isn’t important?  What was the point of anyone claiming...” 

His voice just got really high.  Shit, he knows.  I literally see his mind working.

“You knew that it was easy to figure out it was him.”

“Not as easy as you made it.”

I sigh as Josh becomes very animated, “I didn’t think about the top of the quote...”

“The LIST of things you didn’t think about: including your job, what the President thinks of you.”

“He knows about this?”

“He’s about to.”

He’s about to continue his tirade when it hits him.

“You look amazing.”

I didn’t expect him to stop in the middle of a thought and say that.  I’m flattered.  I give him a full smile, something I haven’t done in 24 hours.  He can’t speak.  I’ve rendered Josh Lyman speechless.  Call the Press!  Never mind, I just realized that Danny is here.

I turn my eyes away from him for a second, “Hi guys!” I say to the men in the snow, “sorry about all this.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Toby says.

“It was stupid but it was menschy,” says Danny.

“Hey, hey, hey, good cop/bad cop, remember?” Ahh, he finally regains his speech.

“Sorry, it was just stupid,” Danny chimes in again.

“Hey, Will, you and Toby wrote maybe the greatest speech I’ve ever heard.”

“Thank you very much!”  Will says.

Josh has recovered from the semi-coma that I put him in.

“We’re going to a ball tonight!”

“Balls are fun,” I say with a sparkle in my eyes.

“We’re actually going to eight of ‘em.”

“Eight times the fun.”

This is what I missed.  It’s only been 24 hours, but I’d rather be unconscious than not have ‘this’ with Josh. 

“I was actually the one who hit the window.  The rest of them went to school on my throw.”

Then he brings the arrogance.

“LET’S GOOO,” Toby, ever the romantic, yells.

I hook my arm in Josh’s while he smiles at the men with an “I told you so” look on his face.  I’d love to have heard Josh’s convincing argument to get them to show up on my doorstep.

“How ya doing, Charlie?” I ask.

“Well, I’m going to win Zoey’s heart from Jean-Paul.”

“Excellent!”

“Cause he may be good-looking and rich and well schooled and French royalty, and live basically in a castle but...Oh God!”

“This is what I’ve been telling you,” Toby chides as he tells Charlie to get in the cab.

“Josh,” I whisper when the others are piled in the taxi, “I’m sorry.  Seriously, I’ve never lied to you before, boss, and it won’t happen again.”

He regards me, letting my sincere apology soak in.  There’s something about him tonight, and I’m not referring to the way his white scarf hangs around his neck.  Maybe it’s his vulnerability or his honesty or the fact that he wants to be with me tonight.

“You’re going to have to sit on someone’s lap,” he says with a smirk.

“Okay,” I respond, thanking God that I’m going to be near this man for the rest of the evening.

Danny snags the front seat, so Josh helps me get in the back, which is already a tight squeeze with Will, Charlie, and Toby sardined in there.

“Sorry!” I say as I puts my weight on one hand trying to balance so that Josh can get in and shut the door.

“Alright, I’m in,” he states as his arms immediately reach for me to bring my unstable body on top of him.  Well, mostly him.  My butt is on his lap, but my back is pressed against Will’s side.  Josh is worried about Will touching me.  I can sense it.

“So, Charlie, who’s Jean-Paul?” Will begins.

The four of them discuss Charlie’s love life, which gives me a moment alone with Josh.

“Hi,” he says by way of re-introduction.

“Hi.”

“I think from here on out you’re gonna have to call me ‘Wild Thing.’”

“You’d just love that, wouldn’t you?”

We smile at each other, getting used to being ‘us’ again.

“You saw the speech?” he asks.

“Yeah.  I taped it in case, you know.”

“You taped it for me?”

I nod and nervously brush a curl out of my face.  He grabs it from my hand and tucks it behind my ear.

“I was worried,” he whispers, ensuring that the others aren’t part of this conversation.

“That I wouldn’t tape it?”

“No,” that causes him to chuckle, “I didn’t think you would betray us...betray me like that.”

“I wouldn’t.”

“But you did,” he states rather harshly.

I look at my hands in my lap.  “I am truly sorry, Josh.  That’s all I’ve got.”

“I know.  It’s a hard lesson to learn.”

“What lesson is that?” I ask.

“To be true to yourself no matter what.  And that honesty is the best policy.  There’s probably four million clichés I could throw at you right now.”

“But you won’t,” I say more as a warning to him.

“No.  I’m just glad we got that straight.”

He puts both of his arms around me and squeezes enough for it to be defined as a hug.  I place my head on his for one second, then pick it up knowing we shouldn’t be doing what we’re doing, even though it’s a simple matter of congestion.

He looks away from me as he says, “I’m sorry about Jack.”

I know that took a lot for him to admit.  I take a deep breath, “Thank you.  I’m not sure where that whole thing was headed.  He hates snow skiing, and he never really cared for my trivia.”

“And he’s a Republican,” Josh adds.

“Yeah, there’s that,” I say with a huge smile.  “All I know is that I’m where I want to be right now.”

“On my lap?” 

“Again with the funny,” I say.

“I wasn’t trying to be.” he was THEN, but now, not so much.

I rest my forehead against his and close my eyes, relishing in the fact that I am back where I belong.

***

When the cab lets us out at the second ball, we all pile out and Josh pays the driver.  He takes me by the hand as we proceed toward the door.

“Ok, Donna and I are going to find CJ.  I’d appreciate it if one of you leaks this to Leo....all except the part about the cab.”

“By ‘the part about the cab’ you mean the entire Operation Rescue Donna?” Charlie asks.

“Exactly.”

“I need a drink,” Toby says as he walks inside and makes a beeline for the bar.

“Come on, Donna,” he says taking off my coat and checking it in.  He swipes two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter.

“There she is,” I say, pointing to the press secretary across the room.

Josh pulls me by the hand toward CJ, taking a few sips of liquid courage as we approach her.

“Donna!”  CJ exclaims as she spots me behind Josh.

“Hi CJ,” I say, still embarrassed by the situation.

Josh launches into the whole story about Jack and the quote, and five minutes later, CJ is hugging me.  CJ’s drunk, but a drunk CJ is a happy CJ, so I’m not complaining.

“The quote’s still out there, Donna, but I’m glad it wasn’t you,” she says.

“I’m sorry, CJ.  It won’t happen again,” I say.

“We’re gonna dance now, CJ, if you’d excuse us.”

“Josh, we shouldn’t.  I mean, we have more important things to worry about,” I protest.

He ignores me and pulls me by the hand onto the dance floor.  “Not right now we don’t.  For the next three and a half minutes, or however long this badly-played Sinatra song lasts, we’re gonna dance.”

I’m grinning.  As we’re walking, I notice Leo, Toby, and Charlie talking in a far corner.  Toby’s got his hand on Leo’s shoulder, and Leo laughs a little while wiping his forehead with his hand.  I breathe a sigh of relief.

Josh looks like he’s walking across the entire floor, so I stop him once we reach a suitable spot to dance.  He wraps one arm around my waist while the other takes my hand in his, and we dance.  I huddle closer to Josh and put my forehead against his soft cheek.  I instinctively close my eyes as he adjusts his hand on my lower back, giving me a firm, quick squeeze.

Leo watches us.  I don’t see him watching, but I know he is, and I don’t care.  I’m almost glad he sees us; sees this.  Leo’s a smart man.

The song is nearly over when Charlie approaches us, “I hate to interrupt, but the President needs you.”

Josh halfway releases me and looks at Charlie with a questioning expression.  We follow him to a back room, where the others are already gathered.

The President appoints Will deputy communications director, then he launches into the reasons why we need to stop the violence in Kundu.

“Sorry everybody, but this is a work night,” he finishes.

We all proceed out while the laughter and dancing around us continues.

***

Once we’re back at the office, I pull some reports for Josh while he works feverishly on plans to converse with the House about why we’re basically going to war.

After about 45 minutes, I step in Josh’s office.  “That’s why you got me, isn’t it?”

“Huh?”

“You came to get me tonight because you knew we’d have to work and you can’t fathom working without me.”

“You uncovered my plan,” he says with a smirk.

I walk closer to his desk feeling the need to be near him when I admit this.

“I didn’t stay at Jack’s last night.”

I can see his expression change to one of relief, but he quickly adjusts.

“Ok,” he asks more than he says, begging me for clarification.

“After I called CJ and told her about the quote, I left.”

“Why?”

Josh walks around his desk so we can be face to face.  This might be too much for me.  I  look at my feet.

“I felt...”

“Used?”

That’s not the word I was looking for, and he immediately regrets saying it.

“I felt guilty.  Guilty that I’d taken the side of a man I’d known for a couple of months versus a man I’ve known for five years.”

“Donna,” he whispers picking up my hand.

I tuck a strand of curly hair behind my ear.  “And my career IS important to me, Josh.  It’s the most important thing in my life.  I wouldn’t want to jeopardize that.  Not for this.  Not for Jack Reese.”

“I wouldn’t let you.  Not for any thing or any man,” he says softly.  He picks our joined hands up and places them against his chest.  “We’ve come too far to throw it all away.”

I know what he’s telling me.  As hard as this is, I know that we can’t be together the way we’d both like to.  Scratch that - the way we’d both love to.  But there will be more moments like tonight - the good times.  There will be more dances, more cab rides, and more late nights and long hours.

But in this moment, knowing what we both know and not being able to express it with words just about kills me.  It kills Josh even more.  He clenches his jaw and takes a step closer to me, now inches away from my face.  I look up at him hesitantly.

He kisses me.

It’s a chaste, closed-mouth kiss that lasts maybe five seconds. It’s reassurance.  It’s a promise that there’s more of this to come, but it can’t happen yet.

When he breaks the kiss, I smile at him.  I touch one of his dimples with my free hand, something I’ve been dying to do for years.  Then I let my finger drag to his lips.  I let it rest there for a second, then replace it with my lips.  My kiss is more intense than his, and it lasts a little longer.  It says more than his too.  It says I’m sorry, but I thank you for your forgiveness.  It says I love you, but I can’t be with you right now.  It says thank you for being the man that you are.  It’s my promise to him that there’s so much more to come.

I think about the bottle of scotch at my house and realize that Josh tastes just like it.  But there’s more to his taste than scotch.  If I could bottle the taste of his lips and the feel of his arms around me, I’d get drunk every single night for the rest of my life.  Maybe that’s where we’re headed.

THE END


End file.
